Some Working Definitions
Autohor's note:
1) this page is occasionally edited to add new definitions or evolve existing ones,
-and-
2) there is lots of disagreement within the community over how to define things—this is my attempt to bring clarity to a very complex issue with many unique experiences.
sex; reproductive sex
A physiological condition—the role one can play in reproduction/procreation, based on the anatomy of one's body at birth: male = provide sperm and a means to implant it into womb; female = provide egg and womb, and a means to accept sperm.
gender
Humans, along with many other animals, are highly social beings, and have evolved complex cognitive and volitional capacities around group socialization. Gender is a big part of that and provides a foundational pillar for the social role we each play in life and how we interact with others. Gender is a healthy condition of the emotional mind that probably exists to steer individuals toward others in a population to facilitate, or moderate, reproduction. In a cultural environment that values "be fruitful and multiply" as the only acceptable model of life, gender has been unnaturally forced upon people base solely on male/female sex dichotomy in order to pair people off for sexual reproduction. However, there is no evidence that gender and sex are necessarily the same within a person, and lots of evidence that they can be very different. In evolutionary biology, diversity leads to stability, so it is likely that gender variation independent of reproductive sex plays a key role in stabilizing population dynamics. As it comes from your psyche rather than your body, it is more foundational to who you are than your reproductive sex, and can be thought of as your true gender rather than the false gender that is externally assigned by others based solely on reproductive sex. Unlike male/female reproductive sex, Gender is not binary, but can be better described as a point along a continuum. Some people's gender is at one extreme end or the other of the continuum, but many are somewhere in between and thus can be very fluid with gendered behavior.
sexual orientation
The gender direction one usually prefers in order to find partners for intimate emotional companionship, or sexual-erotic activity. It is separate and independent from behavior specifically related to reproduction, and includes same-gender, opposite-gender, or multiple-gender preferences.
gender identity
A term invented for, and only useful, when others are not completely accepting of a person's gender, if it diverges from expectations based on traditionalist assumptions about reproductive sex. The term is an attempt to describe true gender when it is different from perceived gender, but in a social environment where there is complete acceptance of a person's true gender regardless of reproductive sex, "gender identity" has no meaning, only "gender" has meaning.
gender expression
Learned social traits and behaviors based in culture, that you use to signal to others what your gender is, based on widely-accepted behavioral traits anchored in long-standing traditions. In cultures where shame is placed on exposing one's reproductive sex body in public social spaces and it is falsely assumed that sex and gender are equivalent, clothing is the most obvious and powerful form of gender expression, but there are many other behavioral traits that are used for gender expression, including posture, voice, gestures, facial expressions, skin decoration, interests, physical contact, social status, and many more. These are not at all absolutes, but only relative to accepted norms in particular social circles. In a social realm where a polar binary gender system is imposed on the gender spectrum, those who's gender lies in the middle of the spectrum may change gender expression frequently.
transgender
In its purest origin, "trans-" is a prefix that means concurrently on opposite sides. Transgender thus can describe when a person's actual gender is different than what others think it is: When your true gender is different than your perceived gender. So, after a person successfully completes a gender transition, they are no longer transgender. Transgender is often described to mean when a person's gender identity is different than their reproductive sex. That definition causes misunderstanding and confusion for many people because it tries to force together the two independent things: gender and sex, and thus is still caught in the trap set by the idea that gender must be equivalent to reproductive sex.
cisgender
"Cis-", in contrast to "trans-" in its purest origin, is a prefix that means concurrently on the same side. Cisgender thus means when a person's true gender is the same as their perceived gender. After a transgender person successfully completes a gender transition, they become cisgender, and no longer transgender. For people who's true gender and perceived gender have been the same since birth (if their gender happens to be the same as traditional expectations assume based on reproductive sex), they were born and remain cisgender.
transsexual
There is much confusion and disagreement about the meaning of this term, particularly as it differs from the meaning of transgender. Since the root "trans-" means to be concurrently on opposite sides, and humans reproduce sexually (not asexually), it is impossible to be simultaneously male and female, therefore it is impossible to be transsexual and the term has no substantive meaning. The same is true for cissexual, since it implies that one body can somehow have more than one functioning reproductive sex. If future medical advances make it possible to give full-functioning reproductive anatomy to someone who didn't previously have it, then these terms may have meaning, but even then someone would not have both reproductive sexes concurrently, so the meaning of these words would still be in question.
gender transitioning
The process of changing how other people experience your gender. It is often misunderstood to mean when people change their own gender, but the condition that leads someone to go through a gender transition can usually be described as knowing within yourself what your gender is while other people believe it is different. So the transition is really about changing other people's perception of your gender in order to understand your true gender, rather than actually changing your gender. Since most people base gender perception on body characteristics and behavior patterns, transitioning usually includes changing the common things used for gender expression, and often includes surgical correction of body conditions that cause other people to misinterpret your gender.
stealth
Originally meaning secretive or clandestine, "stealth" was popularized by the military for aircraft that can't be detected by enemies and attacked because they blend in to the ordinary background. From that it was adopted to mean a certain mode of life for some people living with a transgender history. In that context it means the ability to live in a way where your history is invisible to those who want to be your enemy. You go about life without the people who are set on harming you able to see you that way—you simply blend-in as "ordinary" and are not noticeable as "extraordinary"—and you go to great lengths to protect it, including hiding your own past and possibly distancing yourself from people you were close to before transition. There is an important distinction in this—the people who offer you unconditional love are often aware of that history, but help protect you from harm by helping protect your stealth, and, without the threat of rejection or harm for your transgender past, it would mostly be unnecessary.
Autohor's note:
1) this page is occasionally edited to add new definitions or evolve existing ones,
-and-
2) there is lots of disagreement within the community over how to define things—this is my attempt to bring clarity to a very complex issue with many unique experiences.
sex; reproductive sex
A physiological condition—the role one can play in reproduction/procreation, based on the anatomy of one's body at birth: male = provide sperm and a means to implant it into womb; female = provide egg and womb, and a means to accept sperm.
gender
Humans, along with many other animals, are highly social beings, and have evolved complex cognitive and volitional capacities around group socialization. Gender is a big part of that and provides a foundational pillar for the social role we each play in life and how we interact with others. Gender is a healthy condition of the emotional mind that probably exists to steer individuals toward others in a population to facilitate, or moderate, reproduction. In a cultural environment that values "be fruitful and multiply" as the only acceptable model of life, gender has been unnaturally forced upon people base solely on male/female sex dichotomy in order to pair people off for sexual reproduction. However, there is no evidence that gender and sex are necessarily the same within a person, and lots of evidence that they can be very different. In evolutionary biology, diversity leads to stability, so it is likely that gender variation independent of reproductive sex plays a key role in stabilizing population dynamics. As it comes from your psyche rather than your body, it is more foundational to who you are than your reproductive sex, and can be thought of as your true gender rather than the false gender that is externally assigned by others based solely on reproductive sex. Unlike male/female reproductive sex, Gender is not binary, but can be better described as a point along a continuum. Some people's gender is at one extreme end or the other of the continuum, but many are somewhere in between and thus can be very fluid with gendered behavior.
sexual orientation
The gender direction one usually prefers in order to find partners for intimate emotional companionship, or sexual-erotic activity. It is separate and independent from behavior specifically related to reproduction, and includes same-gender, opposite-gender, or multiple-gender preferences.
gender identity
A term invented for, and only useful, when others are not completely accepting of a person's gender, if it diverges from expectations based on traditionalist assumptions about reproductive sex. The term is an attempt to describe true gender when it is different from perceived gender, but in a social environment where there is complete acceptance of a person's true gender regardless of reproductive sex, "gender identity" has no meaning, only "gender" has meaning.
gender expression
Learned social traits and behaviors based in culture, that you use to signal to others what your gender is, based on widely-accepted behavioral traits anchored in long-standing traditions. In cultures where shame is placed on exposing one's reproductive sex body in public social spaces and it is falsely assumed that sex and gender are equivalent, clothing is the most obvious and powerful form of gender expression, but there are many other behavioral traits that are used for gender expression, including posture, voice, gestures, facial expressions, skin decoration, interests, physical contact, social status, and many more. These are not at all absolutes, but only relative to accepted norms in particular social circles. In a social realm where a polar binary gender system is imposed on the gender spectrum, those who's gender lies in the middle of the spectrum may change gender expression frequently.
transgender
In its purest origin, "trans-" is a prefix that means concurrently on opposite sides. Transgender thus can describe when a person's actual gender is different than what others think it is: When your true gender is different than your perceived gender. So, after a person successfully completes a gender transition, they are no longer transgender. Transgender is often described to mean when a person's gender identity is different than their reproductive sex. That definition causes misunderstanding and confusion for many people because it tries to force together the two independent things: gender and sex, and thus is still caught in the trap set by the idea that gender must be equivalent to reproductive sex.
cisgender
"Cis-", in contrast to "trans-" in its purest origin, is a prefix that means concurrently on the same side. Cisgender thus means when a person's true gender is the same as their perceived gender. After a transgender person successfully completes a gender transition, they become cisgender, and no longer transgender. For people who's true gender and perceived gender have been the same since birth (if their gender happens to be the same as traditional expectations assume based on reproductive sex), they were born and remain cisgender.
transsexual
There is much confusion and disagreement about the meaning of this term, particularly as it differs from the meaning of transgender. Since the root "trans-" means to be concurrently on opposite sides, and humans reproduce sexually (not asexually), it is impossible to be simultaneously male and female, therefore it is impossible to be transsexual and the term has no substantive meaning. The same is true for cissexual, since it implies that one body can somehow have more than one functioning reproductive sex. If future medical advances make it possible to give full-functioning reproductive anatomy to someone who didn't previously have it, then these terms may have meaning, but even then someone would not have both reproductive sexes concurrently, so the meaning of these words would still be in question.
gender transitioning
The process of changing how other people experience your gender. It is often misunderstood to mean when people change their own gender, but the condition that leads someone to go through a gender transition can usually be described as knowing within yourself what your gender is while other people believe it is different. So the transition is really about changing other people's perception of your gender in order to understand your true gender, rather than actually changing your gender. Since most people base gender perception on body characteristics and behavior patterns, transitioning usually includes changing the common things used for gender expression, and often includes surgical correction of body conditions that cause other people to misinterpret your gender.
stealth
Originally meaning secretive or clandestine, "stealth" was popularized by the military for aircraft that can't be detected by enemies and attacked because they blend in to the ordinary background. From that it was adopted to mean a certain mode of life for some people living with a transgender history. In that context it means the ability to live in a way where your history is invisible to those who want to be your enemy. You go about life without the people who are set on harming you able to see you that way—you simply blend-in as "ordinary" and are not noticeable as "extraordinary"—and you go to great lengths to protect it, including hiding your own past and possibly distancing yourself from people you were close to before transition. There is an important distinction in this—the people who offer you unconditional love are often aware of that history, but help protect you from harm by helping protect your stealth, and, without the threat of rejection or harm for your transgender past, it would mostly be unnecessary.
